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Yellow Pages

Yesterday, as I walked through my apartment door... on the floor, besides the mail boxes, lay 6 copies of the latest Yellow pages.

I took 1 in to my flat and ripped off the unnecessary packaging.

To my surprise and delight - My company's name and address is in there!!!

Oh it made me whoop with joy.


Now I know it's only a small thing....

But all these small steps eventually lead to very BIG things...
Just you mark my words!

It felt as good as the first day the signage / placard went outside my offices to s=describe my business. I felt so proud!

Today was a GREAT and productive day, I worked from 10 - 9pm - Got Sooooo much work done on my latest project - tings are gwaan.... Happy Days.


;-)

Eat the ham

You know how women, whilst applying Mascara to their eyes, cannot do it without having their mouth open at the same time? It seems a physical impossibility somehow... Or just one of those many wonders of the world... Watch a woman on a train applying mascara.. yep, her mouth will be open :-O

Well in a similar vain...
Well ok, not really that similar at all really, more of a umm... a wonder really...

Why is it that when you are making a sandwich and you've buttered your bread, you've got everything prepared that once you open a packet of Ham it's simply not possible to get the ham on to the bread WITHOUT atleast popping a slice of ham into your mouth first.

It's just not possible.

No, Really.

Your mouth instantly starts salavating at the back, the smell makes your nose twitch and your

brain says to your mouth: 'Eat the ham, eat the ham, eat the ham'.

It's REALLY not possible to make a ham sandwich without the ham entering your mouth before it gets to the sandwich.

That's a fact by the way.







Soon to be 'home alone'

I'm counting down the days until I have my flat back all to myself.
Hopefully It won't be long.
Yay!!!!!!

It's been nice having company for the last few months - however...
Having my own space - is a gem and it's my own personal retreat - I do treasure that.


This bout of sharing has taught me that I can share a home with someone, when I am good and ready to. It's nowhere near as tough as i had made it out to be in my head.

It's nice to sometimes have someone around to bounce ideas off... (my head is full of them).

I have learnt that I am adaptable, more tolerant than I thought, am good at sharing and am overly generous to others.

It's gonna be great to get my flat back - just me and chi @ home doing our thang.

Ahhhhhhhhhhh.

My Habits

Since living with 'S-to-the-D' we have both noticed some quirky, slightly weird habits of mine. Which include but are not limited to:

* Leaving kitchen cupboard doors open.
Sometimes arriving home and walking into the kitchen IS like a scene out of the Poltergeist movie. I even annoy myself with it. I'll walk in and be like 'Why the fuck are the cupboards all open?'.. Oh yeah, that'd be me. Doh.

* I sneeze A LOT.
Like, RIDICULOUSLY a lot. Doesn't matter what time of the day it is. Man, I can sneeze.
If it were an olympic sport....


* I use stupidly outdated and 80's phrases like:
'Fuzzy wuzzy' and 'Razzle Dazzle'. Which all still make me laugh.

* I am the mad washer woman of STH London - man I can't get away from the damn washing machine. I Love the smell of clean clothes mmm.

I'm sure there's way more...

Karma is a ITCH

I think I have written about Karma before on my blogs.
I do believe in it. What goes around really does come right back around.

I know some people think its a load of old guff - but I don't.

Today my cat has learnt the lesson of karma.
Yes, my cat!

I think it was last week that I wrote about my well loved, well brought up, fed twice a day cat who is adorned with love - Getting into a fight with a homeless cat in the neighbours back yard.
http://www.remioduyemi.com/2007/09/angry-at-my-cat.html

I thought this was quite sucky on her part, i mean the poor homeless cat has enough to deal with... Sleeping in the cold, eating out of dustbins, avoiding foxes and other spoilt cats beating it up, not going to the vets for injuries, bugs or tooth aches... I mean the list is endless, he has a pretty rough deal to put it simply.

But Karma has now dealt with her for her recent antics.

For the first time in about 12 years... She now has FLEA'S!

That's what you get when you rumble in the garden with an unclean cat.
And she has been MISERABLE as hell.
Borderline depressed.

I've let her endure it for about 5 days now...
Mean? Probably.
Lesson taught? I think so.

Being such a clean cat - this has been quite simply AWFUL for her!
Being a bit OCD as well... Probably an absolute nightmare for her.

She has taken to sleeping on the floor.
She's off her food.
And she has the saddest eyes on her - that just say 'HELP ME' everytime I look at her.

Karma is a ITCH.

Feel free to quote me on that. Lol.

Are You the Favorite Person of Anybody?

There are a ton of reasons why I love the internet, I always have and always will do..
But i'm not going to spout my list today about why I love the internet.

All I will say is sometimes when you dig deep beneath the tripe, you fish about, follow leads, poke around crusty sites... and sometimes you follow your nose and truly embrace the idea of 'Surfing the web' - And sometimes... you stumble upon little treasure troves that make you smile, make you laugh, touch your heart and even sometimes, 'make you think' deeply.

Today's find is not about me saying I am 'someones favourite person', because actually, i'm really not sure that I am... (don't worry, i'm not looking for reasurrance on this from anyone).
Being liked and respected is very different to 'being someone elses favourite person'.

I'll be honest, this neither adds or distracts from my life, but i just think its a simple yet deep question when you reflect upon it.

I suppose all I am saying, is that I think it's a great question.
I also think that a lot of people would say 'no' to this question...
But I also think we all have our own favourite people...

But 'Are You the Favorite Person of Anybody?'

Watch this short film.
It's poignant.
It's interesting.

It's a great question.

A little bit of crazy is good

I worked late tonight... This was before I went out for a bite to eat for dinner and some drinks...

On the way to the bathroom before leaving the building - I passed 2 women in the hallway who had both just left another office...

Girl 1 started to talk to girl 2... FUNNILY enough this was just as girl 2 had just placed a bourbon biscuit in her mouth...

Girl 2 - started to reply with her mouth full of biscuit.. it sounded like this..


'Mmph mphu umph mer uh, yeaah?'

By which point girl 1 was now inserting TWO bourbons into her mouth and thought she would now continue the conversation with her mouth also full ...

'mur moun uhh he shher boon sur do err?'

At which point both clocked this was actually really funny and that there was now a third person in the hallway (yep, that'd be me).

Did they flinch? Cower in embarrasment??
Did they fuck.

Both decided, full mouthed to SPEAK at the same time, mouths full, with biscuits overflowing, whilst inserting MORE biscuits into their mouths'.

I was already giggling.

I'm now stood between them both - watching 2 woman having a biscuit conversation and making no sense whatsoever.

'Mmph mphu umph mer uh Mmph mphu umph mer uh Mmph mphu umph mer uh Mmph mphu umph mer uh Mmph mphu umph mer uh Mmph mphu umph mer uh'.

Besides stopping to laugh all I could mutter to the 2 of them was 'Fucking Brilliant'.

Both burst out laughing (mouths full still) - and then continued talking to one another.

In a weird way - I kinda knew what they what they saying to one another...
They also knew what they were saying to one another.

What was great about this whole thing was that this was 2 business women, who clearly work very hard, yet were totally comfortable enough to let their hair down, in public, be silly, not care who saw and just make each other (and me) laugh in the most juvenile way.

It was V funny.

I do think that being 100% comfortable with yourself is a priceless attribute that many of us humans don't know how to do properly or are too scared to get in touch with.


To be that comfortable, silly and a little bit wacky with another person who's willing to go to that place with you - to me, is just brilliant and so liberating.

I have a great bunch of friends who allow me to go to that place also when I need to...
And it is honestly when I am the truest to myself - when I don't have to apologise for my language, my behaviour, my silly thoughts, my bizarre jokes, for being a bit blonde sometimes or for just being me.

You should never apologise for who you are.
I do believe that. Yet, we all do it :-/

Embrace your crazy side people as much as the sensible side..

Because that also defines you, often more so.

No title, deal with it!

To all the scrotes, scumbags, leeches, users and insecure fuckwits that insist upon being in my life, flitting around in my world, hanging around me, sapping my energy, my spark, my pizzazz, my time, my friendship, my kindness, my heart and soul and just about everything from inside of me – to fill your own unsatisfied bellies with – how about you all just FUCK OFF.

Sometimes enough is enough.


Fight for your dreams - Lovely quote.

"Life is full of beauty. Notice it.
Notice the bumblebee, the small child, and the smiling faces.
Smell the rain and feel the wind.
Live your life to the fullest potential and fight for your dreams."

~ Ashley Smith

Is the grass always greener?

Being single can be a bit crappy, sometimes.
We all know that.

But being in a miserable relationship is even 'crappier' I think.

P.S. I'm not referring to myself here ;-)

Alabama ER

I'm not really sure how 'authentic' this picture is.. However, it is quite a thought provoking picture nonetheless.

Hmm, what would I do.

Will the real REMI please stand up?

... So here's the deal....

I've been co-habiting with a boy for the last 6 weeks - we'll just call him 'special drew' for now :-)

Yesterday I baked 2 pumpkin pies from scratch and thoroughly enjoyed it.

Yep, I BAKED - incl the shortcrust pastry!!!
Errr.. Hellloo!!

AND Yesterday I made a salad with CELERY and BEETROOT in it.
Are you fucking serious?? Yes I am, and do you know what.. I enjoyed every mouthful of it.
These are 2 vegetables that from a very young age I detested.
Celery always tasted like posion.
Now I love them. It's totally freaking weird.


I think today, I might put a dress on...

Ummmm......

'Are you my dad?'

There’s a man in the gym I’ve started to see recently.

And there’s something about him, I’m not sure what it is, or why it is, but I have this overwhelming sensation every time I see him, that he is my father.

I’m fully aware that that is a strange and bizarre statement to make, yet it’s truly something I feel.

I have not seen my dad since my mum and he split some 20 years ago.

I have no idea what he looks like except for a faded image in my head of an old sephia photo I saw once of him, when I was about 10. That’s all I have to go on.

What’s more peculiar, is how this gentleman in turn looks at me when he see's me.
I don’t mean in a sexual way.
I mean in more of a familiar way.
There is definitely a sense of ‘something there’.

Could it really be after all these years of no contact that the world is so small that he could turn up and be a local member of my gym?

I suppose weirder things have happened.

I’m truly stumped by this and have no idea how to approach this.
Surely you can't go up to a perfect stranger and say 'Are you my dad?'.

It would be the most incredible, amazing, powerful and inspiring thing that could ever happen to me, to find and get to know my father.

Angry at my cat...

I got really annoyed with my cat today for multiple reasons…

I let her out after her incessant whining to go out. And yes, cats do whine. She was pawing the window, meow-ing, doing that whinny meow that’s not a real meow but a half in the throat kinda sound that grates on your nerves after about 10 seconds.Then she would stare at me – then look out the window – then stare at me laying on the guilt trip that she had not been outside for a few days.

At this point, I should’ve guessed that she had spotted another cat outside, but she was just too smart for me on this one.

So I walked her out the front door, gave her the usual warning about ‘not crossing the road’ – like she even understands. And as I open the door to the street she shot out and down the stairs faster than I could say ‘I love yoooooo’.

The usual drill is that I give her 20 – 30 mins to roam about in the neighbour’s gardens. I go to the door and she’s waiting for me to let her back in. OR I go to the door, she isn’t there so I give 1 call and where ever she is on the street – she’ll come running home (yes, I have her trained like a dog). OR OR I completely get distracted, forget I let her out, and one of my neighbours lets her in the block and gives me a ding on the door bell to let her back into the flat.

Today, none of the above happened.

I went out after 30 mins – she was not there.
I went there after 45 mins – she wasn’t there.

So I go outside and call. No response. No running to mamma.

So I walk to my neighbour’s pathway and there I see her and she is squared up, face to face with another cat. All that separates them is a few steps. She now looks nothing like my tiny dainty petite Chi that we all know all love, she’s now 3 times her normal size as her fur is all ruffled, her tail is HUGE and she looks like some breed of monster cat all growling, hissy and gnarly.

So I call her – and we both know that she now has a choice to make, either – come to mamma (& lose face in this fight) – or hold her ground to fight off this cat.

She chose the latter and that really got my goat.

I’m thinking – it is I who feeds you, you cheeky cow.
It’s not like you can’t see or hear me standing here calling you.

So I thought fuck it. If you’re not gonna respect me, I’m not gonna respect you, I’m gonna walk over and pick you up like a baby and humiliate you during combat with this cat and then he’ll go and tell all the other cats that you are the resident ‘pussy’ on this street. HA HA.

So I walk towards her and I can see her slightly reducing in size because she knows it me – but now she’s doing that whole ‘tennis head’ thing – looking left to right, left to right, mummy to cat, mummy to cat….

The other cat seizes his moment, retreats and bolts away to the rear of the garden – Chi, catches him making his move and bolts after him to attack him again.
I was really annoyed.

Now, the thing is I don’t know if I was annoyed because:
a) I thought she might get hurt
b) because she wasn’t listening to me
c) because whilst standing outside dealing with her my toast was burning
d) the fact she was beating up a homeless cat – he’s got enough shit to deal with I think
e) because I thought I raised her better than that – to street fight, how undignified
f) because she was being all territorial and it wasn’t even her garden
g) the fact that she was acting like a CAT and quite frankly I’ve come to think of her as a human, she talks to me, she brings me things and she shows my love and affection.
h) the fact that my slippers were all muddy from traipsing through gardens after her

After 5 mins of me crawling through green bush to get her out I proceeded to coax her out with my foot. Every time she tried to do the whole ‘flip over on the ground and don’t I look sweet thing’ – I gave her a tap with my foot and forced her home saying ‘I don’t think so love’.

She got in the house and followed me to the kitchen.
I told her that was mean to chase the cat down like that.

She tried to rub herself against my legs as she normally does.
I wouldn’t allow her to.
She kept trying.
I kept moving away so she knew I was pissed at her.
I put her food down and left her to eat.

By the time she got back to the bedroom, I felt a bit bad so gave her a stroke.

I then went to the gym, and when I returned an hour later she didn’t come to meet me at the door as she normally does.

Now she’s sat in the cupboard in the bedroom, double pissed back at me (probably rightfully so), and is now not giving me any attention whatsoever.

That’s probably a fair cop really.