Remi's new scooter!

I recently purchased myself a new toy to make myself happy... Let's be honest, no one else was gonna buy it for me....

I've got it in white for better visibility (and all that good stuff).

So I went out with the intension of buying an old school vespa - cos they look wicked and I ended up with this. Bender Kelly is most certainly to blame!

I told him I wanted to get a bike cos driving in london... or should i say sitting in my car in traffic (in london) - when trying to get to meetings - was driving me insane.

1 hour to drive 6 miles? Fuck me that's wanky.
And what a pointless waste of time..

So i said fuck it - get a bike and whizz about - live baby - dont waste your life locked in a car in a traffic jam.

So anyway - He started going on in his boring (but actually sensible and correct way) about how i should buy a new bike cos it'll come with Gaurantees and insurance and blah blah blah blah... And I went from wanting to spend £500 - to spending £2500 ON A SCOOTERRRRRRRRRRRRRR! That goes no faster than 50mph.. hmmm....

But you know what.... 50mph is a hell of a lot faster than 0mph when i'm sat in my car in 2 mile fucking car backup.

So that's where we are at.

If you hate my new bike - well... I probably hate you.

If you like my new bike... - well, you can be in my club.

By the way - in the event that i get killed whilst learning how to ride my new bike - in london, where car drivers dont give a fuck about people on bikes...

Can someone ensure that when i'm buried in my coffin - that i have the following:
- Firstly check that i really am dead, nothing worse than being buried alive
- Secondly a duvet wrapped around me (I don't like to sleep without a cover and i might get cold down there)
- and thirdly my ipod. It has to be on the songs playlist so all my tunes can just run and run....

Thank you and good night!